“Don’t take counsel of your fears.”

My dad would always say this to me when I was standing at some kind of fork in the road. A big decision. A risk I wasn’t sure I was ready to take. At the time, it used to really annoy me. I didn’t want a proverb—I wanted answers. But over the years, those words have stuck with me. And lately, I've been reminded of them again.

In the last few months, I’ve been in a lot of rooms with leaders trying to make sense of what’s next. Budgets are being cut. Teams are shifting. Priorities are changing, sometimes weekly. The market’s in flux. And expectations are sky-high—even when resources are stretched thin. There’s pressure to make the right call—but not always enough clarity to know what that is. And under all of that, there’s often something quieter sitting just beneath the surface: fear.

I don’t mean fear in the dramatic, fall-apart sense. I mean the kind that whispers things like:

‍Maybe we should wait.”

“Let’s revisit the plan one more time.”

“It’s safer to do what we’ve always done.”

“Let’s get more data.”

Sometimes thefear isn’t about the decision itself, it’s about what people will think ofyou after you make it. Will I lose credibility? Will people be upset? Will this change how they see me? I see a lot of leaders holding back, not because they don’t know what to do, but because they’re trying to protect how they’re perceived. They wait for the moment when the decision will make everyone happy ,which rarely comes. And ironically, waiting is what ends up frustrating people most.

It’s subtle. It sounds responsible. But the longer we take counsel of our fears, they more they start to sound like wisdom.

Here's what I've seen:

·      Teams start to drift when leaders pause for too long.

·      Inaction doesn’t calm anxiety, it amplifies it.

·      Silence gets filled with stories.

·      And when leaders don’t move, teams stop trusting that anything will move.

Leadership isn’t about ignoring fear—it’s about not letting it steer. It’s about noticing what’s making you hesitate and then choosing to move forward anyway. With intention. With humility. And with enough clarity to give your team something to hold onto, even if it’s not the full picture yet.

So, when the path is uncertain—and let’s be honest, it often is—ask yourself:
What do I know for sure?
What matters most right now?
How can I move in alignment with our values, even if the rest is still coming into focus?

That’s how you lead with steadiness. Not because you’re sure of everything, but because you’re grounded in something deeper than fear.

And as muchas it pained me to admit it back then, my dad was right. Fear might get a seatat the table—but it doesn’t get a vote.

If you're feeling stuck, try this: name the fear, name what matters most, and then take one step in that direction.

What would that look like for you right now?

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